**Toxic relationships are not only poison for love, but also for mental and physical health. How to recognise them and what to do about them.**

Something went wrong. When Sandra got together with Nina, they were both in seventh heaven. But then came the accusations, the demands, and the jealousy. And suddenly Sandra sits there and feels lonely. She rarely does anything with her friends anymore, because she doesn't want to hurt Nina. She always gets jealous and snaps quickly.

What is a toxic relationship?
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Without really noticing it, Sandra got into a toxic relationship. This can happen to people who have had traumatic experiences in the past. They get involved with partners who are in an inner imbalance and this can lead to  "toxic" relationships. The main signs of a toxic relationship are insecurity, power, fear, self-centeredness, and addiction. It is often the case that certain characteristics appear in both partners.

How do you recognise a toxic relationship?
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You can recognise a toxic relationship by these characteristics.

**Control**

There is a point at which jealousy tips over into pathology. For example, when the partner suddenly starts checking on the other person at every turn. Reading your partner's messages is an absolute no-go! People often justify this by saying that they have very strong feelings or simply want to look after the other person. In reality, however, unreasonable control combined with jealousy is a sign of a toxic relationship.

**Disparagement**

There are people who constantly belittle their partners. Everything that the other person says and does is not good enough, he or she makes fun of everything. This can also be just small remarks about friends, family or even the partner's hobbies. In the long run, this damages your self-confidence and is bad for your mental health!

**Manipulation**

Do you have the feeling that your partner is getting inside your head and playing with your feelings? Are you suddenly doing things you know you don't want to do? Then it could be that you are being manipulated - a sure sign of being in a toxic relationship.

**Too strong a bond**

There is no question that attachment is important. But when the need for attachment becomes so strong that it overruns one of the partners, it can be a sign of an unhealthy or toxic relationship.

**Isolation**

Isolation can creep up on you slowly. First you are supposed to spend more and more time with your partner, then suddenly you are no longer supposed to meet your friends. And at some point you just sit at home and are there for your partner. Something is going very wrong! If you notice that you are becoming isolated, this is a clear sign that you are in a toxic relationship or are getting into one.

**Sabotage**

You hear strange rumours about yourself all the time. And then one of your friends tells you that your partner has been telling lies about you. He or she is preventing you from being successful in the things you love. Sabotage is also a sign that you are in an unhealthy relationship.

**Finger pointing**

Repeated blaming can also be a sign of a toxic relationship. Especially when your partner:blames you for things you had nothing to do with. This can go as far as emotional blackmail: "If you leave me, I'll hurt myself!" If you hear such sentences, it is high time to change something!

**Unpredictability**

Everyone has mood swings, no question about that. But if your partner makes you feel like you can't do anything right, that's a warning sign. If he or she reacts unpredictably to the smallest things, it's a clear sign that something is out of balance. And that can be poison for the relationship.

**Irresponsibility**

For a healthy relationship, it is important that both partners take responsibility for each other and for themselves. But if one of them always shifts the responsibility to the other, that is a sign that something is wrong. Especially when the responsibility clearly lies with him or her! This is especially true if the person rejects responsibility because he or she was intoxicated.

**Dishonesty**

If one of the partners spreads lies about the other or shares intimate details of the relationship, this can be a sign of a toxic relationship. This can be the case, for example, when agreements are broken and not talked about.

What can I do if I am in a toxic relationship?
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Of course, not every one of the above-mentioned characteristics has to mean the end of a relationship. Everyone is dishonest at times, and jealousy is a normal human emotion. But when it starts to hurt or when someone's personal freedom is restricted, that's not a good sign.

Often people wonder how it could have come to this or even feel ashamed. But if you have the feeling that you are in a toxic relationship, it is high time to get professional help. And even though it may be difficult, the most important thing is to start talking about your problems! And do so with friends and family. It can happen to anyone and everyone to get into unfavourable situations. But no one has to feel ashamed or bad about it!

You suspect that you are living in a toxic relationship and want to change that? Let's talk about it! Book a free 30-minute trial session with one of our coaches today!

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What is a toxic relationship? How can I recognise it and what can I do if I am in a toxic relationship?

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Toxic relationships: How to recognise them and what to do about them